The Other Bennet Sister Episode 9 Recap

MayVo informs us that she’s made a decision and knows what she wants now. She considers her wardrobe, rejects one of her ‘staying with the family’ dresses and chooses one we’ve never seen before. She’s charting new courses both personally and sartorially, I see.

Over breakfast, Caroline throws some condescension Mary’s way and Aunt G looks like she’d happily stuff Scafell Pike down the lady’s throat. Even William gives her a WTF look, but Mary’s reached a sort of zen place where Caroline just doesn’t bother her anymore.

'We will END YOU, lady'

For whatever reason, Caroline trains her cannons on Tom next, disingenuously telling him how sorry she was over his humiliatingly public dumping. I don’t know what she’s hoping to gain by this. Guess it makes her feel superior? To Tom?

The Gardiners have finally had enough and shut Caroline up by saying it’s really NBD and here, have some smelly fish, why don’t you? Also, there’s no more coffee, so you’ll have to climb Scafell uncaffeinated.

Caroline waxes rhapsodic about standing where Wordsworth himself stood and Mary corrects her: it was Dorothy Wordsworth who climbed Scafell, not William Wordsworth. Ryder stares at her like she said the most profound thing.

Mary’s outfit for today is GORGEOUS. She’s figured out clothes! The colours of both dress and spencer are highly improbable in this pre-aniline dyes era, but they’re so pretty I’ll take them!

Tom joins her out in the garden for some pre-climb stretching (hee!) and admits he does not care much for Caroline. Neither does Mary. Something else they have in common!

Mary thinks that only wealth makes a person attractive to Caroline, which prompts Tom to ask if Mary thinks money’s important. For no reason, Mary tells him that Lizzy only realised she loved Darcy when she saw how impressive Pemberley was.

Yikes! Way to imply that your sister’s a gold digger, Mary, and that’s not really what Lizzy meant. It’s not even quite what she said, she said she started to fall for him when she saw the ‘beautiful grounds at Pemberley’. Lizzy has a great love of the outdoors, and Pemberley has a beautiful, natural setting. And Darcy was more natural in it. It wasn’t about the grand house, but about how he was when he was there, and how the house and grounds reflect the man he is.

Also, that’s not what Tom asked.

Thankfully, Mr Hurst runs over with some racing stats, wanting Mary’s opinion on a particular horse’s odds. Apparently, she’s been educating herself about racing, because after asking a few questions, she gives him a confident response. It’s kind of cute that they’re horse friends now. Caroline and Louisa Hurst don’t seem pleased about it, though.

William comes out and the boys start doing some sort of competitive warm-ups.

Be fa-b-u-lous!

Their guide summons them and they head out, Tom limping a little, having overdone it with the high kicks. Heh.

This episode has been brought to you by the Lake District Tourist Board

On the hike, Tom gives Mary a honeysuckle, so of course William has to give her a primrose. He also gives one to Caroline. Their guide drops an old wives’ tale that the first to eat a primrose will be the first to marry. I think he just made that up to see if these ladies would do the obvious thing so he could laugh at them later. Of course, Caroline turns away and hoovers hers.

With more than 2000 feet left to go to the summit, the Hursts tap out, which means the Gardiners have to go with them, because the Hursts have no idea how to get back. Have they tried going down? Mrs G’s disappointed, until her husband points out that the inn will be quiet, with everyone out, which is perfect for some afternoon delight, and then she motors right on out of there, the two of them leaving the Hursts choking on their dust. Ha!

They reach the summit, and the guide points out the direction of the Solway Firth, and Scotland beyond. ‘And beyond that?’ Mary asks, because I guess she’s never looked at a map before.

As Mary gazes towards the world beyond, Tom comes up behind her and asks, smiling, what her mother would say, if she could see Mary now. Ha! She wouldn’t say anything nice, that’s for sure. And I’m also sure she wouldn’t have made it past the garden at the inn.

Mary (probably correctly) says her mother would say something about the wind having ruined her hair. Mrs B would be wrong: Mary’s hair looks great.

(And can I just say how grateful I am that all the ladies’ hair is appropriately pinned up at all times? It always bugs me in period films when adult women are running around with their hair all over the place.)

They talk about how breathtaking the view is, how small and insignificant they feel. And how short one’s time on earth is and how they should do all they can in the time they have.

Having launched the most perfect of proposals, Tom starts to move ahead, adorably awkwardly, not entirely sure what to say, which makes them both giggle. Laughing together is so important, you two! You’re gonna be great together.

He tells her how much he loves spending time with her, and talking to her, and she says she feels the same. This is so cute. They’re both so happy and laughing and talking and almost crying and it’s so sweet!

‘I wondered, if you would—’ he starts to say, and then WILLIAM BUSTS IN. ARRRRGHHHHHHH! He absolutely, 100% did this on purpose. He was watching, and he did that on purpose. I do not like this guy. At all.

This. Guy.

Mary, hilariously, is like, ‘Just keep going! Keep going!’ but the moment is broken, and William’s there, asking for a word, and for some reason neither Tom nor Mary kick him right off the mountain.

They both try to get rid of him, but William will not be deterred, so Tom grits his teeth, tells Mary they’ll continue their chat later, and walks off with William. Poor Mary sighs, disappointed.

She goes and has some snacks with Caroline and the guide, while the boys continue their talk. Mary asks Catherine if she knows what’s going on, but all Caroline knows is it has something to do with Lady Catherine de Bourgh.

William pats Tom on the shoulder and leaves him up near the summit, returning to the ladies with a smile and apologies for the business talk. Since they’re done with their business talk now, Mary gets up and goes to join Tom, who’s crying, I think? She suggests they pick up where they left off, but he tells her his circumstances have changed. Did he get fired? What happened here? He refuses to give Mary any details and leaves her, baffled, at the top of the mountain.

William draws her off to examine the view and recite I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud. Maybe I’m just crabby, but I’m tired of all the Wordsworth. There were other poets. Lots of others. This feels a little lazy.

Later, he tries to engage Mary in some playful conversation, but she’s in no mood. She asks him what’s up with Tom, and William, smiling like a demented golden retriever, says Tom’s fine, just fine!

Before this discussion can go any further, the guide interrupts and tells them there’s a storm coming, and they really need to get off the mountain at once. Caroline snits that they only just got there. You guys had time for a near-proposal and a picnic, you haven’t ‘just arrived’ Caroline, and honestly, she doesn’t seem like the type to want to stay up on a mountain when someone’s told her a storm’s coming. She’d get soaked and her clothes would be ruined.

The guide insists they leave, and Tom’s all for it, because this day has been a hell of a bust for him anyway, but also, he has more sense than all the others put together. Caroline whinily asks how the guide would know a storm’s coming. It’s his JOB, Caroline.

William sees no need for them to leave right away, which really should have prompted Mary to grab her stuff and get a move on. Seriously, whatever William suggests, do the opposite. He makes bad suggestions. He and Caroline are Team Stay at the Summit. Tom asks Mary for her opinion.

‘Can you imagine what it would be like to experience a storm from up here?’ William asks. Oh my GOD how stupid is this man? Yes, definitely get yourself to the highest point around to WATCH A STORM COME IN. And then have fun making a slippery, treacherous descent in multiple layers of sodden clothes and (for the ladies) skirts. But hey! Wordsworth said watching storms was cool! So Mary decides to stay a little longer. Sigh. You know, just because you read books doesn’t make you smart, does it?

The guide, not being a moron, leaves. Tom elects to stay, because he’s not about to leave Mary up there. Just barely holding himself in check, he tells Mary this is very unlike her, and she gets annoyed with him and says maybe she got tired of the old Mary and wants to try a new one. Mary, putting yourself at risk is a poor way of expressing your frustration and annoyance, however justified it might be. Take it out on William, you know he’s the cause of all this! Instead you’re siding with him!

‘Sometimes we must seize the moment and finish what we set out to do without letting anything get in our way,’ she says. Again, learn to place your anger better, Mary. He apologizes for having disappointed her.

SUCH a dumb tourist thing to do

The storm rolls in, and the guide was right, it’s a big one. William quotes Resolution and Independence by the only poet that apparently ever existed. This is LAZY. Throw in some Shakespeare or Spenser or, hey, how about William Blake? He literally wrote a poem called Mary! It took me all of 5 seconds of Googling to find that out, so there’s no excuse here. (Also, they'd probably just want to quote the first bit of that particular poem.)

It starts to rain and oh, NOW they want to leave. Except for William, who’s all, ‘Isn’t this the greatest?’ I half expect him to be half-hanging off the mountain shouting, ‘Truth! Beauty!’ like he's George Emerson.

Tom starts hustling the ladies back towards the path and William finally agrees that they can head down now. Thanks for the permission, you idiot.

William continues treating this all as a lark, hopping along while Caroline wails and Tom helps Mary down a steep bit. She tells him she’s sorry, and he just tells her to stay close, because he doesn’t want to lose her on a mountain in a storm. He did, after all, promise Mrs G he’d look after her.

The boys go a little ahead to check the path, and Caroline slips and gets her foot wedged in a rock or something. She shouts for help, but the only one who hears her and comes back is Mary. With some difficulty, she manages to get Caroline free and helps her walk.

Tom doubles back and takes control of Caroline, who can’t walk so much as limp-hobble. William, I guess, has f’d right off and just left them all on the mountain. Figures.

Two hours later, William’s wondering if something might have happened and makes noises about going to look for them. It’s just now occurring to you that something might have gone wrong, William? You’ve been sat here for how long?

Tom and Mary, with Caroline between them, finally arrive and Tom rather pointedly tells William that he had to basically carry Caroline down the mountain. He hands that particular burden over, and then Mary faints in Aunt G’s arms, fully afflicted with Regency Romance Girl Fever. I hate that trope.

Tom sweeps her into his manly arms and carries this delicate flower inside, where she lies upon the bed, being tenderly ministered to by her loving aunt, while Tom, forearms fully on display, in the hope it shalt rouse his lady love, paces anxiously (but manfully but sensitively) in the corridor.  

The Hursts, Caroline, and William all leave together. Just in case we weren’t sure which guy we’re supposed to be rooting for.

Mary hovers at the very edge of picturesque death. Tom maintains his vigil. Aunt G has changed into a dark dress, for these dark, dark times. She comes out into the corridor to report there is no change, but that he should get some rest, which he will not do, oh no, not wilst his love, his very heart, lies hovering betwixt this world and the next.

Mary recovers. Of course she does. Does anyone ever die of Regency Romance Girl Fever? I’m happy to be proven wrong! Tom is relieved she will live. And also he can go eat something, or use the bathroom, because he’s been sitting outside her room for how long now?

With Mary on the road to recovery, Tom leaves. Ok, then.